Quantum physicists say they’ve discovered a third state of the Mountain Road which is both open and closed. Previously, traditional science had predicted the route from Ramsey…… Read more “Scientists find third Mountain Road state”
Category: News
Fake news from the Isle of Man.
Tiniest clue leads crack IOM compliance duo to huge conspiracy
Two compliance officers at a company in Douglas have been commended after a grain of sand led them to uncover a multimillion pound criminal scheme.Juan Kennaugh of…… Read more “Tiniest clue leads crack IOM compliance duo to huge conspiracy”
Ministers search for heart after getting defibrillator
Senior ministers are preparing to find out whether they can be helped by a new defibrillator outside government offices. The lifesaving equipment works by zapping hearts with…… Read more “Ministers search for heart after getting defibrillator”
Bike racer hopes to win bike race
As the countdown continues to TT, one competitors has revealed what he wants from this year. The man, who races motorbikes for a living says he’s hoping…… Read more “Bike racer hopes to win bike race”
Rolling roadblocks on Douglas Prom
Douglas gets its promenade traffic calming measures back today. The Island’s capital will see giant shaggy animals patrolling its seafront on the lookout for small children they…… Read more “Rolling roadblocks on Douglas Prom”
Man breaks Quarterbridge record
A man’s celebrating after spending just 23 minutes staring at clueless pensioners at the Island’s most famous double roundabout. Previously, Douglas Costain of Ballakilwheaarey had managed to…… Read more “Man breaks Quarterbridge record”
Commissioners deny Rushen nerve agent plot
Rushen commissioners have denied any involvement with a nerve agent plot, as countries around the world expel the local authority’s spies. Usually more concerned with dog fouling…… Read more “Commissioners deny Rushen nerve agent plot”
Brexit negotiations: ‘got your nose’, chief minister tells EU and UK
Chief Minister Howard Quayle has unveiled his Brexit negotiating strategy – stealing noses from UK and EU leaders. Mr Quayle took the step after realising the Isle…… Read more “Brexit negotiations: ‘got your nose’, chief minister tells EU and UK”
Andreas man splits atom with head
A man from Andreas has become the first person in the world to split the atom with a headbutt. Dougie The Mile Quacken thought the smallest constituent unit…… Read more “Andreas man splits atom with head”
Isle of Man on TV!
The Isle of Man appeared on TV last night – although you had to be eagle-eyed to catch it! Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey was being repeated between…… Read more “Isle of Man on TV!”
Minister freed after trapping head in bag
Education, Sport and Culture Minister Graham Cregeen is thanking his lucky stars – after getting his head stuck in a paper bag. Fortunately for the Malew MHK,…… Read more “Minister freed after trapping head in bag”
Police seal office kitchen
Police have sealed off an office kitchen in Douglas. Officers say they were forced to take action after the rest facility used by finance sector workers became…… Read more “Police seal office kitchen”
Unauthorised shed costs Kirk Michael man’s life
Commissioners have praised the village’s community spirit after a man was burned at the stake for building a shed without planning permission.”Our village is already overdeveloped and…… Read more “Unauthorised shed costs Kirk Michael man’s life”
NASA searches for Peel man’s ‘easy way to Mars’
A team from NASA is investigating a Peel man’s claim getting to Mars would be ‘a piece of piss’. In the Whitehouse earlier this week, Gordy Quane…… Read more “NASA searches for Peel man’s ‘easy way to Mars’”
UN peacekeepers arrive in Lonan and Laxey demilitarised zone
United Nations troops got out their minibus today to begin segregating and disarming both sides in the Lonan and Laxey crisis. The simmering border dispute which threatens…… Read more “UN peacekeepers arrive in Lonan and Laxey demilitarised zone”
Castletown to ban parents’ night pub crawls
Castletown’s preparing to amend its byelaws and ban rowdy parents’ night revelries in the town. The local authority says the sight of mums and dads celebrating their…… Read more “Castletown to ban parents’ night pub crawls”
Minister rescues child from well
Treasury minister Alf Cannan has been described as “a very good boy” and given a chew treat after saving a child in danger. He found five-year-old Timmy…… Read more “Minister rescues child from well”
Call for Island to introduce Frankenstein’s Law
Paedophiles on the Island care calling for Tynwald to introduce new laws tracking and supervising angry mobs. The so-called Frankenstein’s Law was introduced in Europe after a…… Read more “Call for Island to introduce Frankenstein’s Law”
Sacking ‘not my fault’ says former shitshow department minister
Former health and social care minister Kate Beecroft says the chief minister was why she was sacked – not her repeated fuckups. She says her sacking was a…… Read more “Sacking ‘not my fault’ says former shitshow department minister”
Moddhey D’oh! Woman mistakes log for dog
A woman from St Johns who claimed she was bitten by the Moddhey Dhoo has admitted she just fell over a log. Diaspora Quayle, 62, was walking…… Read more “Moddhey D’oh! Woman mistakes log for dog”
Fleet Skeet 