A UK man who asked what the difference was between Lonan and Laxey has sparked a major escalation of tensions in the region.

Tanks have been massing on both sides of the border, and both areas have been quick to accuse the other of provocation.

Both were assimilated by the Garff Imperium in 2016AD after decades of feuding over their status as Parish and Village respectively.

Chief Minister Howard Quayle has warned he is prepared to launch a transparent and open strategic review with appropriate stakeholders of titanic proportions unless the two districts hold face to face talks.